They can’t all be winners

So far, I’d like to think I’ve painted a pretty sweet picture of being married for you. I’ve talked a little about the in’s and out of our relationship and I’ve even given you some reasons why I love my wife to pieces.


We ain’t exempt from the fuckery that is marriage. (Yeah, I used ain’t. Yeah, I know it ain’t a proper. FIGHT ME!)

fight me

This latest tiff we have found ourselves in, technically stemmed from last night. I’ll leave most of the details to your imagination, just keep in mind we have full on silent arguments about Tupperware. If you’ve read The Oath then you know how we do. The fight NEVER changes!!

This latest disagreement lead me to the question:

Why do all married couples have that one thing they fight about over and over again?

… Or should I say, all the couples I know and have been around.


At what point in the game do the marriage gods call a meeting to decide that the fight you and your spouse are going to continue to fight about for the rest of your lives is going to be about whether or not ketchup should be cold or hot, how the bread should be closed, the right way to fold laundry, socks, or any number of asinine things?

Whoever said marriage is work ain’t never lied!


What they don’t tell you is what kind of work.

Left to my own devices I was thinking “Oh, I’m gonna have to work to keep my figure. Work to keep it spicy in the bedroom. Work to maintain a happy work life balance.”

No one told me that in reality I would spend 80% of my time working to not shake the shit out of my wife. I would have to work to not say things out of anger that I know I’ll regret later when we’re having a petty disagreement. Work to keep my sanity while juggling everyday wife. These are the things people should have been telling me about.

Maybe they did and I just wasn’t listening hard enough.

Moral of the story kids, happy wife happy life DON’T WORK WHEN YOU’RE BOTH THE WIFE!


Until next time…

Don’t judge me, you don’t know my life!!

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